Wednesday, March 9, 2011

"Whatever you are, be a good one" -Abraham Lincoln

So, I got an email last night that will forever effect my life. No, a Nigerian prince didn't leave me a million dollars in his will and just needs my bank account information to proceed. And it wasn't an email about the secret to getting rid of stretch marks and cellulite in 30 days. But that would be awesome.

It was an email from a reader of my blog. 

Yes, a simple email that will forever make me appreciate myself, and what I bring, and my life. I won't share the personal details. Just an email, sharing a very personal story of her life. With me. And you know why I got the email? Because she felt like I could understand what she's been through, based on what I've written in my blog. Talk about an impact. And an honor.

I try to be real in my blog. I've un-followed blogs before in the past. You know the blogs I'm talking about. 

"Johnny and I churned butter last night, and then I woke up at sunrise to make fresh bread! And then I taught my 2 year old how to read Shakespeare! And I let Sally help me paint the walls of the house, and yes she tracked house paint all over the brand new expensive carpet, but it was great for her motor skills and self confidence! Then I'm going to retile the bathroom and change the oil in the car before Handsome Hubby gets home, where I'll be making dinner wearing a dress, heels and pearls. I love my happy life!"



I can't handle reading that crap. 

I want to read blogs about moms who had a bad day with their kids. Moms who hit up the drive thru after a long day of softball practices and school activites. Mom who bitch about wanting to lose weight, but hitting up Krispie Kreme on the way home. Yes, I'm all about self improvement, but I need to see that I'm not the only one struggling with "life".

Mommy life. Wife life. Life. 

I won't pretend to be perfect. I'm not. Hell, I didn't realize until I got out of the shower this morning that I forgot to shave a leg this morning. Like, not just a section. Like, the entire leg. You'd think I'd figure out how to shower by now. You'd think it'd be a simple concept.

Shave right leg. Then shave left. Or just eliminate the second step like I did. Oops.

This won't be a blog where I'll tell you to eat more fiber, or how to get an entire cartful of groceries for $21. It won't be a blog where I'll tell you how amazing my life is and every single day is sunshine, unicorns and rainbows. It's not. Life is real. And it's not always pretty and shiny. But I try and keep a positive attitude. That's the best I've got.

I try and remember that each person is dealing with their own battles. And it's not always so obvious. They're not out wearing a tshirt that says "I have a crazy ex" or "I hate myself" or something like that. Maybe the waitress who forgot your drink isn't actually a forgetful bitch, but is thinking about her grandmother in the hospital.

Life is life. And it's hard.

So thank you, dear reader, for making me feel like I've had an impact on your corner of the world. It meant a lot. Really. So much that I texted hubby last night and told him that I now knew the purpose to my blog. 

Maybe it's purpose is to show you what decor you DON'T want in your house. Or give you a laugh because I don't have a clue what I'm doing when it comes to cooking. And I make up crafts as I go along and get lucky along the way. And to show you that I struggle every single day with being a better mommy. 

But I'm me. It's what I've got.

Thank you, friend.


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24 people love me:

Natalia Lynn said... [Reply to comment]

LOL, i love it! I know what you mean about the 'perfect' blogs. I feel like saying sometime 'well, dang, my husband isn't perfect! And my kids don't always listen and my house isn't always clean, AND THAT IS OKAY!!' I don't know who does like reading that stuff!

Shawna said... [Reply to comment]

Sometimes I think it would be nice if people DID walk around wearing shirts that explained themselves. I'd totally wear one.

Kris @ everywhereorange.com said... [Reply to comment]

I seriously snorted when i read about forgetting to shave a leg. I did that yesterday with my left armpit :) LOL!!

Creative Escapes said... [Reply to comment]

OK - I love this post! Love it love it!!!! And - at least you got one leg shaved - that's one more than me this morning :)

Whimsy-ma-blog said... [Reply to comment]

As you know, I'm glad I met you, friend.

Christine @ craftygeordi.blogspot.com said... [Reply to comment]

Oh. I only shave my legs once per week. I think something might be wrong with me.....
Seriously, I enjoy the perfect blogs like I enjoy any other fictional story. I've known a couple of women, one was the perfect stay at home mommy with the perfect husband, perfect house and perfect kids whose names all matched. She attemted suicide. Then her husband left her and moved to Seattle with his very young hoe. The other woman was a beautiful model, well-to-do financially, volunteered her time, had a nice boyfriend. She committed suicide. Both of these women taught me that things are not what they appear on the surface. I want no part of that perfection if it means taking on problems of this magnitude as well.

Nicole said... [Reply to comment]

what a great post, when I'm looking for blogs to follow I will look at but not follow those blogs that seem to professional or "martha stewartish" unless they are really good and I need tips for certain things. Right now I have frito's on my kitchen floor from my 18 month old pouring them out and crunching them on the floor. I'll get to it when I get to it and its nice to know there is someone else out there who isn't afraid to be real in a world full of phoneys (that looks weird, *lol)
Take care,
Nicole

Jenn said... [Reply to comment]

This is great! After reading the other comments, I feel like I need to confess...I haven't put laundry away in 3 weeks! I've washed it, but it's like a treasure hunt digging through the baskets and dryer if you want something in particular in the morning. But with all the other responsibilities I take on as a working, now blogging, mother, it's the least of my worries! Heck, just last night I confessed on my blog to playing "blog hookie" to catch up on American Idol! Blogging is theraputic for me, like I've heard from lots of other bloggers, so you have to be yourself and be truthful, or it's not worth the time you're investing.

Nadine A said... [Reply to comment]

This post is full of win!

Kristen said... [Reply to comment]

Hm. Since I'm not constantly going on about how perfect my life is and how my husband is the awesomest and how all the clothes in my closet are JUST TOO BIG now, I always thought I was the problem - just a big ol' cynical mess thinking that nobody else could possibly be that happy. And the truth is that they aren't, because you're right - there is ALWAYS something. The Donna Reid types just don't let anyone else on to what it is.

It's reassuring, in a weird way.

Jaime @ Our Journey said... [Reply to comment]

And this is why I faithfully follow your blog! I'm also totally loving the comments on this post; I can't stop smiling!

Ummm ... and I had 7 loads of clean laundry piled on my bedroom floor up until today .. oh wait, there's still one there!

Nicolette @ Momnivore's Dilemma said... [Reply to comment]

Thanks for making me cry laughing. There must be something in the air, because there are a LOT of keeping it real posts floating in my google reader today.

I'm all about showing the dust bunnies, the ruined furniture, and the clutter. Isn't that why the reality tv "fad" hasn't gone away?

Models are airbrushed, motherhood is not.

p.s. I do know the the cure for cellulite. But I plan on patenting it.

Nicole said... [Reply to comment]

hey after I posted that on my blog I tried to lay down with our youngest son and he decided to puke all over me. At that point I had to put the baby and myself in the tub, there is some stuff even baby wipes won't make smell better.
I hope you are able to enjoy some mommy time as well!

Sam @ The Junk House said... [Reply to comment]

At least you shaved one leg! I haven't shaved either in a while! Haha, my poor boyfriend...

SJ @ Homemaker On A Dime said... [Reply to comment]

Hi, Jen! Yup, you're so authentic and candid in your post about real life. I would suggest that you visit and follow the following mommy blogs and I'm sure you'll enjoy reading their honest-to-goodness views about motherhood and family life. And they're great writers, too.

http://www.mom-101.com/, http://www.suburbanturmoil.blogspot.com/, www.dooce.com

Btw, thank you for joining in the Swap Followings Linky Party and making the blog party a success :) Hope you'll link up again next month.

jandjhome said... [Reply to comment]

I love this post. Unfortunately, I'm not a mom. But even with just two of us in the house. Right now, I have had dirty dishes in the sink for 2 days, my ironed clothes in the family room since last Thursday, about 8 pairs of shoes on the floor of my room, projects ALL over the house waiting to be finished, and my kithen island has not seen light since Monday. I will be picking up as my cleaning lady will be here tomorrow. Thank God for her. Oh, and I haven't shaved since Friday. Maybe I will today, my husband is flying in from a business trip. Ooh la la.

Lisa ~ The SweetTalk Shop said... [Reply to comment]

keepin it real, keepin it real!!! And I LOVE IT!!!

Nicole said... [Reply to comment]

This blog post caught my attention people the title is my all time favorite quote and I am a huge fan of Abraham Lincoln!!

Nicole - http://insidethemindofnicole.blogspot.com/

LP aka A Crafty Southern Chick said... [Reply to comment]

I love this post. I love everything you said. I even love the comments. I mean, I thought I was the only one that stacked my laundry baskets 3 high and used them like my dresser. My empty dresser 'cause all my laundry is neatly folded, still in baskets ;)

Jess (hellowifeonline.com) said... [Reply to comment]

This is just great, thank you! True story: last night while lying in my perfect bed, next to my perfect husband, he looked over lovingly at me, then retracted in horror, saying, "Oh my gosh! At first, it looked like you had a face full of stubble, but now I realize I was just seeing your hairy armpit." I love your one-leg shaving story. More!

Becky said... [Reply to comment]

I love this. Thanks for keeping it real! From a mother of three who fed her kids cake for breakfast, cinnamon rolls for lunch and goldfish for dinner, because that's what they said they wanted and I couldn't stand to hear another kid whine about veggies!

Catherine said... [Reply to comment]

One of the reasons I love your blog is because of how real you are. I try to be somewhat real, but I feel like my life is so much of a mess right now if I was totally real I would scare people off! Although I feel like I am myself on my blog, so I don't need to air all kinds of dirty laundry or anything... but I'm sure I will use it to vent sometimes.

I really enjoy your stories, they make me laugh, smile, and ease up on my self-inflicted guilt. Thanks!

Fabulously Flawed said... [Reply to comment]

Great post, sweetie!
I'm glad that you've been such a great friend to a perfect stranger. It proves what a fabulous and giving heart you have!

It's really easy to be a jerk. Seriously. It takes way more energy to be kind and gentle and gracious.
And being a good listener is totally under-rated!

carolyn said... [Reply to comment]

i'm catching up on my feeds and i needed to chime in and say that, when my husband's out of town and it's just me and the kid, i'll happily live out of the laundry basket and won't run the dishwasher until we're all out of plates and have to eat our (drive-thru procured) dinner on paper towels.

and seriously, i give up on shaving my legs in the winter. you can imagine how popular my legs are during those months...